Fall

I had the chance to go for a 9 hour jeeping trip. The fall colrs were spectacular and that word doesn't even describe the beauty that nature exhibited.

I will post pictures later. I am so behind on pictures as I have been concentrating on getting my favorite ones enlarged and adding to my "wall" down at the coffee shop.

It does seem the longer you look at your pictures the worse they become. I have to shelve them and then come back a month or so later to see which ones I really like.

Our patio is finally done. We have patio furniture, ping-pong table and a dart board. Plus the b-q. At least we can enjoy it some before the snow falls.

The man was laid off. It has been a difficult time for him as he has never been without a job. Finacially we can make it by just tightening up the belt straps. It is just hard on him. He has struggled with depression ever since his dad died and then the selling of his folks home, my dad dying, sending his mom off to a far away state. Now his uncle is talking about not making it through the next 6 months so... He will have to grab onto the good Lord's hand. That is all any of us can do.

The "boys" are doing good. The oldest one is happy and so is his wife. The youngest is back in college getting his degree. I pray for them every day. I feel with the upheavel of this old world that the Lord might be coming soon. I don't want any to be lost.

Been a long time

I left the blog world for awhile. I want to start back. As you can see the diet one went no where LOL!
Life has been interesting these last 6 months. I will summarize
1. Remembered Daddy's birthday. #2 since he has been gone (unbeknowst to me our 2nd dog was born that day)
2. As mentioned above - got a second dog. Cockapoo.
3. Was going to make another job change but instead stayed, got a raise and more support
4. Husband and I celebrated our 26th anniversary (marriage is going good - kinda different than the norm but it works for us)
5. Youngest sons girlfriend moved in
6. Went on our 5th annual vacation trip
7. Was going to be a grandma but a miscarriage happened. I am excited to become one again.
8. Youngest started college - electronics/robotics
9. Put in fence - patio and sidewalk
9 (a) The man has been laid off
10. Depression continues to knock me for a loop every now and then (just this past Thursday/Friday)
11. Still searching out the Good Lord
12. Praying for friends and family continually
13. My photos are up in a local coffee shop - working at getting better and wanting to take some classes.

Up at my sons. We are playing Wii. I love it! Now I want one! Wii Fitness looks like it would be great also.

I will post some of my pix this week. It is really hard not to go back and delete many of my blogs but it helps me see where I have come from. Many have been deleted so I don't want to delete anymore.

Until next time!
Me

Catch - up

Life has been moving at a frantic pace. I am visiting my son (thus the picture - it was in his "picture" file) and have a few quiet moments while they finish playing monopoly. My duties during this time are to watch the puppy and make sure their huge lab doesn't eat her. Actually they are "playing" very well together. It is a nice change from our visit last weekend when we went down south to visit my mom at her vacation home. Now, her two dogs would have taken her to task if she tried playing with them.I finished this weeks homework n Friday so I don't feel pressured to leave early so I can finish homework. I still am a bit anxious though because this coming week every minute is full with meetings, school projects, work in general and of course all the things that need to be done at home. I will try and stay up late tonight and get ahead in my homework.I was longing to write in this blog last week. I was feeling so stressed and like I could never accomplish everything that needs to be done. Work keeps piling up - new expectations all the time. I can't believe I consider being the Corporate EH Nurse. She is overwhelmed and so I am trying to help her out as the higher powers that be see me as "valuable." I got an e-mail from my new boss and she wrote a note to the fact. Saying I was to be on a corporate committee because my knowledge is is highly valued. Well who can say no to that?So now I am one of those people who are trying to climb the ladder and putting all else at risk. One of those people I said I would never become. My plans are still on for Bangledesh. I hope to stop and spend 3 days in HongKong. It will probably be the only time I leave the US because the "man" will not leave - won't even go into Mexico. Silly guy - at least he is letting me go on my adventure.I haven't been taking pictures because I am so busy - with the price of gasoline going so high I am not sure that I will even be able to jeep that much in order to get all the pictures I want.They are done with the ggame so I will shut down and write more next time I have a minute. I am done with school on 4/18 so hopefully it will be before then.

Still Alive

Life is rushing by at a speed that is unbelievable. Seems I am never caught up. Every weekend I think I am going to write in my blog and then never do.

Missy Bear is getting "big" and has such a sweet personality.

9 weeks of school left.

We were to have visited son and wife but the man was sick this weekend and I am now getting sick.

Will be traveling south this coming weekend to visit mother if the weather holds.

As is the case everywhere this has been anusual winter. Love the amount of snow we have been getting.

Must get to work - will try and find some time this coming week to reflect a bit more

Still waiting

Still waiting for miss pup (no name yet). I should get her this comming weekend or the following. It depends how she is eating. Slowly buying the necessities and reading all about potty training, training, socializing etc. It shall be a lot of work but like a child if you do the work in the begining the rest isn't as hard as if you didn't.

We actually have a warm sunny day. It is nice to have cool air and sun that warms the old bones.

I am listening to Mercy Me, Ben is upstairs with Sarah, the man is napping and I am getting ready to write to all those who wrote over the Christmas holidays. Tonight will do my daily 4-5 hours of homework.

Watched an awesome sermon this morning. I love Jon Courson's thoughts and the way the Lord uses him to share the good Word. I am learning to let the Lord lead in all of my activities.

I am really wanting to go to Bangledesh in November. I will let the Lord determine that. Meanwhile I shall get my Visa, passport and vaccines.

Must always remember to let the Potter mold me into what he wants. "Search me oh Lord and if there be any wicked way...."

One week down only 14 (?) to go

First week of school... After getting everything figured out we are off to a start. I was very stressed this past week at work and with school. I need to calm down a bit. I also need to rely on the good Lord instead of relying on myself.
My stepsis graduated today. She called earlier in the week - need to unload some tears. She was wishing daddy could be at her graduation. Sad moments come along every so often. A day has not gone by this past year that I have not remembered my dad is dead. Wonder when I will miss a day?
We have so much snow. The weather is more like it was when I moved here years ago. I love it! It is suppose to warm up but I wishing for another large snowstorm
Little One, pictured above will be able to leave its mommy in about 2 1/2 weeks. I dread the puppy stage. It is a poodle mix so will be cuter than a poodle.
Oldest will be moving into their new home next weekend. So proud of him. Youngest started back to college - I am proud of him taking on the challenge.
I was going to go to the place of my childhood on the day that dad died but changed my mid. School is too hard to miss any days. Will spend the day reflecting the good times.
Took a grand picture yesterday - it is awesome. It might be one I enter next year.
Nothing planned - just work, school and housework in between.
The man gets the second eye done tomorrow then in a few weeks I get my eyes done - no more contacts or glasses!!!!
Time to do dishes - - -

December 29th

I took this picture last Christmas. I used Adobe to make it look like it is painted. Fun stuff.

My mind has circled around several main thoughts today. Birthdays for one, destinations along life's pathway and friendship are the others.

Tis my moms birthday. She is really handling it well. I am so proud of her for not getting in the dumps but rather she is concentrating on being thankful to the Lord for life and blessings. All of us come to the point in our lives when the inevitable aging scares us but that stage should only last a minute.

Tis CA's birthday too. The pain isn't as strong anymore when I think of the loss. I think sometimes there is more of an angry feeling. Anger because I was going to give up everything to be with him - I let myself be more vulnerable than I have ever been in my life. The whole thing ended so differently than I expected. My mind begins to question - was I really that special to him - would he have really given up everything too? BUT what does it matter - it is over - life moves on - people change. I fight to remain aloof from the emotions that rise when I contemplate him- I hope his birthday brings him joy - that he spends time with the ones he loves, and that all his dreams for his future come true.

I went on the quad today. Up in the hills where there is a lot of snow. I only got stuck once. High centered the thing while waiting to load it back on the trailer. It was fun and refreshing to get out in the open again. It is really different wheel'n in the snow. The snow hides the ruts, rocks etc. I only landed in a few deep ruts. Saw deer and pheasant. There was a lot of people shooting around the vicinity and a group of paintballers - we managed not to get shot. My younger son and his girlfriend went. She is a city gal and we are trying to get her used to all of our outdoor activities - I get the giggles watching her.

We have company - the mans brother and his kids. They are watching football so I am hiding in my room.

I might be getting a dog - this is really embarrassing but it is going to be a .......... poodle..... yikes I said it. They are ssssooooo ugly! The reason is because I am not allergic to them. I watched my sons girlfriends poodle and he slept in bed with us. I loved it. I miss having an indoor dog. I really want a maltipoo. They are so cute but range in price from $900 to $2000. I can't spend that kind of money on a dog! Even poodles can be expensive!

If I get one it will be a toy poodle. I am looking at all the rescue shelters here in the state. It is

sad how many dogs need homes.

I dread school this semester. I will be taking 10 credit hours and the semester lasts 14 weeks. I have new responsibilities at work, several trips I have to go on, so I am a bit worried if I will make it through in one piece. My depression is the worst in Feb and March. I also start Weight Watchers this coming week. I will go for the 14 weeks I am in school. So.. it almost sounds like I am setting myself up for failure somewhere along the way. I will have to create time for me to stop and gather everything back into perspective. I think I will also hire someone to come in and clean the house from top to bottom every 3 weeks of course I have to get the man to agree to that first.

We were out at a restaurant last night when an older couple caught my attention. She had said something to him and he was giving her the cruelest look, or so I thought. I started paying attention to their conversation. Turns out she was asking him if he knew where they had just come from, what had happened last night etc. The man was also trying to talk to me so I was trying to listen to both at once. I watched her start to tremble and fight back tears. It was at that point I got up and went over to her to see if everything was all right. Apparently he had just barely lost his memory of the past few weeks. I assessed him and advised her to get him checked out at the clinic nearest the restaurant. He was too stubborn though. He insisted nothing was wrong. I went to the clinic right after they left and she never went. I am guessing she took him home and called one of her kids to help her get him to the doc. Just a dear couple. It will be hard to loose the man - that is if he goes first. Even if we struggle at every turn I depend on him for a lot.

Well, guess I will read before I slip into a sleep that carries me away from life's struggles. I love to sleep. Life is perfect for those moments yet - at the same time there is no joy, no feeling of triumph when an obstacle is overcome,no ability to drink in the ambiance of nature. I guess I would rather be alive and feeling than asleep while life rushes by.